"The Greatest Deception Men Suffer Is From Their Own Opinions"
If I had to choose one book, only one (excepting religious texts) to have with me for the rest of my life, I would choose Leadership and Self-Deception. It is written by the Arbinger Institute and I adore EVERYTHING they do.
Have you ever known a... special someone... who thought the reason things in their life were wrong was because of EVERYONE ELSE, when really, they were the one causing their own problems? I'll bet they were exceptionally good at ticking people off and causing a ton of problems for everyone around them as well. Know anyone like that? Yeah, me too.
Have YOU ever been that "special someone" (and maybe not even known it)? I totally have. And I still am. I have stomped around the house saying that the house is never clean because my kids are slobs. But MY room is not clean. When I think everyone else is grumpy and misbehaving, it's really me that is grumpy because I stayed up until 1am reading a book. When I complain that my teenager is not listening to me...have I really listened to him?
Sometimes (read: USUALLY) WE are the problem, but we don't KNOW that we are the problem. This is called self-deception and this book helps us to see more clearly. It all starts with self-betrayal.
When we betray ourselves, we are "in the box". This means our vision gets distorted, we deceive ourselves and we end up being "that person". I'm not doing a great job of explaining this (I'm probably just confusing you), so just get Leadership and Self-Deception already. Really. It is life changing.
I find that I have to read this book every year, at least. It is so easy to betray myself. It is super easy for me not help someone when I feel I should because I am "too busy", because they were a jerk or because it should be someone else's turn. Or maybe to just view people as objects that are in my way, or problems that need to be solved.
I do this all the time. But being aware of it, and reviewing it often helps me to get better at it. The great thing about this book is that it is an easy read. It's in a story format and even my 11 year old understands this deep concept that they teach so brilliantly.
Buy this book, get it from the library, or borrow it from a friend and read it now. Give it to yourself for Christmas. It will change your life, I promise.
P.S. A Tip From One Who Knows: Don't give this book to anyone else unless they ask for it. I fell in love with it and gave it to a lot of people for Christmas one year. I totally offended everyone- they thought I was telling them that they were in the box! (And truthfully, maybe I was, now that I think about it.) True story- it was bad. :(
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